What is a Good Parent?
Introduction
Many people believe that a good parent is the one who has good children. This is a misguided conception. The truth is that good parents can have any kind of children regardless of the kids’ behaviors or characteristics whether well mannered, poorly behaved, mentally retarded, bright or dull in academics among any other related characteristics (Jenner, 2008). Many factors such as their genes, experiences in life, their culture, the community they live in, the schools they go to, their parents’ advice and upbringing among other numerous factors affects a particular child’s behavior or character. However, parents are largely responsible for the behaviors of their own children. A parent can educate the kids, provide good models for them to emulate but whether the child will successful emulate or follow these parental lessons, is irrelevant in defining who a good parent is. The most important aspect of parenting is that the parent has done his/her part in the modeling of the child (Jenner, 2008).
A good parent expresses love and affection towards the child. This is shown by little encouragements, cuddling the kids, telling the child how much you love him/her and loving them unconditionally i.e. don’t try to change them to be who you think they should be. Another good parenting tip is to always be praising your children and do not compare them with others even their own brothers or sisters (Jenner2008). Teach the child that it is normal to be different and unique and not follow what others do. Always take into account that your child is an individual hence do not try to make them live as you lived.
Always avoid criticizing your child and do not be judgmental. In any occasion that your child has misbehaved or acted in a disorderly manner, make it clear that that behavior is unacceptable and lay down guidelines and show him/her the acceptable codes of behavior, but do not under ant circumstances judge them and tell them that they are bad. Always be assertive but in a kind way. Do not humiliate your kid/kids in public, take him/her away and disciple them in private (Jenner2008). You should model out the kind of behavior and character that you want your children to emulate. Live by the codes of standards that you have set for them and lead by example. This is because kids tend to emulate the behavior what they see and what they hear (Jenner2008).
As a parent, you should be consistent by enforce the same rules all the time and communicate clearly. At times, do not rush to rescue your kids from the consequences of their own actions, but only if the consequences are not severe. Life is a wonderful teacher itself and it is good to sometimes let them learn by themselves from it. Do not make decisions for them all the time avoid doing things for your children which you know they can be able to accomplish themselves, this will aid in making them responsible for their own actions (Jenner2008).
A good parent should always listen to their children and show interest in their activities. This will make it easier for them to be able to come to you whenever they are faced with a problem. Take time off your busy schedule to spend with your kids and make sure to spend quality time with each child individually (if they are more than one). This can be done by attending school functions, going to the park with the kid among others.
Eliminate all bad behaviors even in yourself and members of the family close to your kids. This includes quitting drinking, smoking, gambling, and drug abuse among others. Always be ready to practice what you preach hence when you tell your kids not to do drugs, be sure yourself and other close family members are not doing drugs (Jenner2008).
Conclusion
Good parenting is a great responsibility and requires total focus and determination from parents in order for them to be ‘good parents’. As a parent always know that there is no one universally accepted way or method of raising kids as all children are different hence parents should not follow behavioral stereotypes of culture or ethnic clans. Parenting is not hard but it requires a mother or a father to maintain good friendship with the kids and show them that you are their parent and not their equal.
References
Fontenelle, D. (2001). How to be a good parent : by dealing effectively with the most common behavioral problems of children. Chicago: Gretna.
Jenner, S. (2008). The parent/child game. London: Bloomsbury.
Metzger, C. D. (2006). The good parenting guide : parenting, nurturing, and basic care for children. Chicago: Mac Pub.
